G.I. Joe Rise of Cobra

[jbomb1234]

This is a RANT! If you don't like those, leave now. If there is already a G.I. Joe thread, I did not see it and I am not going through a bunch of pages to find it. If you are still here feel free to read on but this post does contain SPOILERS so read at your own risk. :bones:



I am sure many of you already know, some may not know, and others are just finding out now but Cobra Commander WILL NOT be wearing his trademark mask. He is going to be called The Doctor and he has an thing on the lower half of his face and one fake eye. The reason they did this according to IMDB is Cobra Commander looks too much like a KKK member. WTF! This is the most evil man in the world and they say he looks to much like a clan member. I seen him kick dogs, kill people, and try to blow up the world and they think he looks too much like a clan member. I have not seen what he looks like in the movie in that stuff and I really don't care. If you can show him in cartoons made for kids, comic books made for teenagers, and movies made for everybody with his mask on, THEN WHY CAN'T HE HAVE HIS MASK NOW!!!!! This is an outrage and if this looks as bad as I think it will they will get hate mail from me. I know it will do no good but I am sick of Hollowood trying to kill my childhood. I grew up in the 80's with G.I. Joe cartons and comics and if he was not too much then he sure as hell is not too much now. If they did not want to use the mask they could of used the helmet that he uses the other half of the time. That would of been acceptable but no they want to be original with something that is already made. If you want to be original, fine but do it with a new series and NOT something that is already out. As far as I am concerned all the did was mix Dr. Mindbender and Cobra Commander. The funny part is I never liked Dr. Mindbender anyway because he made Serpentor. There is only one true ruler of Cobra and that is Cobra Commander.

In the end I am going to watch the movie but I am lucky enough to have friends at the theater so I won't have to pay to get in. TAKE THAT HOLLYWOOD! I will sit down with my drink and watch the movie and then I will be back here to either say I was wrong/hoaxed and it was a good movie or I was right and they will get a few letters from me with lots of four letter words.

If you want proof of this go to IMDB. You can find "The Doctor" Cobra Commander file card if you look hard enough online but it could be fake so I am not going to post it here.

[TokyoRacer]

Who the hell wants to watch this failure of a movie? The movie is so bad that the director got fired during post-production.

[Twi]

I'll probably go see it with a friend, if only to make fun of it.

[MCAV]

I'm not ruining my childhood for crap like this...
I've said that about a lot of movies coming out lately...

[Twi]

well I've never seen any original G.I. Joe stuff, so there's no memories to ruin. xD

[airyie]

There is always the case where (and I quote) "It is sooo bad that it is actually good".

At least, that is what I'm hoping for. I'm unable to pass up a HD action movie. It is just an impossibility for me.

[TokyoRacer]

There is always the case where (and I quote) "It is sooo bad that it is actually good".

At least, that is what I'm hoping for. I'm unable to pass up a HD action movie. It is just an impossibility for me.



According to reports, in the entire HISTORY of Paramount Pictures (which was founded in 1912, mind you) G.I. Joe has tested the LOWEST scores of any Paramount Pictures movie ever with test audiences.

That right there is enough to make me not want to see it.

[Vic]

I'm not ruining my childhood for crap like this...
I've said that about a lot of movies coming out lately...

QFT

[TW501]

I share the sentiments of pretty much everyone here, particularly MCAV's statement.

[Zero-sama]

I am gonna see this movie, I am a fan since a long time from this franchise. But, I just wanna see this summer Blockbuster films so I can flamed them. Aside from Star Trek, The Hangover, and Bruno that have been the best thus far, all the others have been crap. Now will G. I. Joe will be a failure, well it in that boat.

[airyie]

According to reports, in the entire HISTORY of Paramount Pictures (which was founded in 1912, mind you) G.I. Joe has tested the LOWEST scores of any Paramount Pictures movie ever with test audiences.

That right there is enough to make me not want to see it.

wow...I sure didn't know that.

I may actually spend that $8 on Bruno The Time Traveler's Wife or something.

[dyne]

if it wasnt a kids movie i might care

[jbomb1234]

I must say I am shocked. The movie was not bad at all. It was pretty good. Yes it would of been better if they had not ruined Cobra Commander more or less but the movie is worth seeing.

I give it a 3 1/2 out of five overall. If you know nothing about G.I. Joe it is a solid 4 and if you are a G.I. Joe fan it is a 3 so 3 1/2 is a perfect rating.

[Firefly]

Someone told me that Cobra was a woman in the movie and GI Joe was played by a dancer, is any of this fact or is it just fiction?

[Yexley]

Not going to watch it, end of. Only people who didn't see anything about GI Joe as a child will watch this as they don't have memories to ruin with Hollywood bullshit starring some gay dancer.

[airyie]

Ok. I went to the movies with a friend. It was a choice between this or G Force...so obviously I suggested GI Joe.

Guess what? It isn't half bad. It has everything a normal action movie has and it was interesting. It had a fairly happy ending - the guy gets the girl- and also a cliff hanger for a possible season 2.

The only thing I could really condemn are the cheesy bad guy voices and the nano-whatevers that looked like green fungus. Still it was steriotypical and funny, and I liked it.

Of course, I never saw the the original (so no memories to ruin!) and I'm a bit biased cus Christopher Eccleston was in it...he makes a good sortof-badguy.

[jbomb1234]

Someone told me that Cobra was a woman in the movie and GI Joe was played by a dancer, is any of this fact or is it just fiction?

All fiction. No female Cobra Commander and no dancers. What ever they were on when they watched the movie, they need to share.

Ok. I went to the movies with a friend. It was a choice between this or G Force...so obviously I suggested GI Joe.

Guess what? It isn't half bad. It has everything a normal action movie has and it was interesting. It had a fairly happy ending - the guy gets the girl- and also a cliff hanger for a possible season 2.

The only thing I could really condemn are the cheesy bad guy voices and the nano-whatevers that looked like green fungus. Still it was steriotypical and funny, and I liked it.

Of course, I never saw the the original (so no memories to ruin!) and I'm a bit biased cus Christopher Eccleston was in it...he makes a good sortof-badguy.

Look at the old 80's cartoons and the voices make more sense. As for the nanites, they had to choose a color. Why not green?

Glad you liked it. Some people did not catch that thing at the end with Zartan.

[airyie]

All fiction. No female Cobra Commander and no dancers. What ever they were on when they watched the movie, they need to share.



Look at the old 80's cartoons and the voices make more sense. As for the nanites, they had to choose a color. Why not green?

Glad you liked it. Some people did not catch that thing at the end with Zartan.

And I'm probably one of those people. Who is Zartan?

[CyberVerse2vZ]

I saw the movie. Not a fan of the cartoon but my sisters claim they use to watch it, but I never saw it through my childhood. They said they liked it.

Me and my freinds went to watch it and it was a pretty epic action movie. The chicks were hot when they were in action. If I remember Cobra Commander does put the Mask on in the end of the movie. I can see why some fans are disapointed in his Live action self. I myself didn't get the ending with the president whistling. All I get is that it was that one guy that appeared earlier in the film. Does it have any other meaning other then that?

I was disapointed with the ending though. Here we all were expecting a kickass battle at the end of the movie and bam they show the two villains in a jail like thingy.

Overall great film.

7.5/10

[jbomb1234]

And I'm probably one of those people. Who is Zartan?

I saw the movie. Not a fan of the cartoon but my sisters claim they use to watch it, but I never saw it through my childhood. They said they liked it.

Me and my freinds went to watch it and it was a pretty epic action movie. The chicks were hot when they were in action. If I remember Cobra Commander does put the Mask on in the end of the movie. I can see why some fans are disapointed in his Live action self. I myself didn't get the ending with the president whistling. All I get is that it was that one guy that appeared earlier in the film. Does it have any other meaning other then that?

I was disapointed with the ending though. Here we all were expecting a kickass battle at the end of the movie and bam they show the two villains in a jail like thingy.

Overall great film.

7.5/10

Wow I guess more people missed it then I thought. I don't know how to hide spoilers so I am saying it now. If you have not seen the movie this is a HUGE spoiler.
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Ok here we go. Zartan is the guy who was whistling all the time. He was almost a background character but is VERY important. The first time you see him is on Destro sub reading the book about the US political system and saying this is why nothing every gets done. Next you see him with Storm Shadow and Bareness attacking the G.I. JOE HQ. He is the one that kills the girl and makes Storm Shadow mad. First he takes a G.I. Joe uniform and then he gets away by killing the guy with the camels. Next time you see him it is in The Doctor/Cobra Commanders lab getting the nanobot treatment. They change his eyes, hair, and then his face as they cut away. Now you are begining to get it arent you. The 12th super soilder they were talking about in the lab was one of the presidents secret service agent. The 12th soilder kills the presidents guards and then the "person" enters and the president says so this is what it is all about. That person is Zartan and the president knows what is going on when he sees his own face.

In short they swithed out the president of the US with Zartan and the only clue to that fact is the whistling. Other than that he spent 18 months studing the president down to the last detail. More or less the US now works for Cobra until Zartan is found out.

So the sequel should be pretty good if they get to make one.

[airyie]

oh ok. Now I know who we're talking about. He's the guy they mentioned was a master of disguise.

Never watched the cartoon or whatever, so I didn't know his name. Was his name even mentioned in the movie?

[jbomb1234]

They may of said it when he was getting the nanites put in him. I think. Other than that, no. You do see his name in the credits though :D

[seiftis]

Saw the movie yesterday and didn't like it. Was somewhat okay in the beginning, until they recruited the two main guys... and it all went downhill afterwards. Story and dialogues were both bleh.