There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. But since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children; that reduces the workload to 15% of the total, or 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.

Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the...

DK

Result of an insomnia bout and a poster i have at home:

1. “I think war is a dangerous place.”
2. “It’s clearly a budget, its got lots of numbers in it!”
3. “One of the great things about books is that sometimes they have fantastic pictures”
4. “You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test”
5. “It is clear our nation is reliant upon big foreign oil. More and more of our imports are coming from overseas.”
6. “They...

DK

1) When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.

2)Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

3) Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

4) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.

5) Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the...

DK

FEMALE PRAYER

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,

One who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.

I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,

Massages my back and begs for more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll...

DK